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Random Thoughts While Riding My Bike.

I recently purchased a new bike. A Trek hybrid 7200 FX bike.

And when I ride around town, which I have tried to do daily for the past couple of weeks, there's a lot of time to think, at least when I am not dodging rampaging vehicles and zig-zagging runners/walkers and other PAPERBOY-esque obstacles.

Today, as I was riding around, I passed a large townhouse with five large SUVs (an Escalade, a Hummer, two Suburbans, and one of the big Fords, Excursion, I believe) parked in front of it. Each of those SUVs had one kind of strange thing in common. Each vehicle had a blue bumper sticker with the following slogan in white lettering:


Four had supplementary stickers, as well. A 'W' with a circle around it and a line through it was on one. Two had Kerry/Edwards stickers. One of those with the Kerry/Edwards sticker also had a Chris Bell sticker. And one had the "somewhere in Texas a village is missing its idiot."

And for the other one, the blue sticker about Bush being a one-termer was sufficient.

I can only imagine what was going on in there. Maybe it was Texas' own vast (but exhaustingly futile) left-wing conspiracy. I wanted to knock on the door and see what was going on in there, but I pressed on. But it made me wonder what could possibly possess five friends/coworkers/associates to keep such an embarrassing slogan on their vehicles, 10 months after Bush was elected to a second term. Was it some sort of demonic pact? A dare gone horribly wrong?

The Kerry sticker is odd enough as it is, but to boast that President Bush is going to be a one-termer, even as he serves his second term, is just mind-bogglingly weird.

But it is enlightening. For many liberals in this country, the campaign never ended. It is a permanent campaign, and they will not rest until they have defeated President Bush.

But that's not going to happen. In 2006, when Democrats once again fail to take back the U.S. Senate or U.S. House of Representatives, we'll once again see articles about folks seeking psychiatric treatment for their anti-Bush derangement. We'll once again see media stories with lines like, "but, but, but... how could this have happened? EVERYONE hates Bush. Didn't you see our polls?"

For that group of five SUV-driving Texas liberals, they have likely been hating Bush for more than a decade, going back to his six years as Governor. They know nothing else but Bush-derangement. Their Bush-derangement is the only thing that feels right. It is institutionalized.

What could compel a self-respecting man-- other than an "THE END IS NEAR" millenial type-- to maintain a sticker with an embarrassingly incorrect prediction on his otherwise nice car, nearly a year after the foolish prediction was smashed into smithereens?

The gang of five might have just been old campaign buddies, getting back together to reminisce on old times, to brainstorm what went wrong on the creation of those fake memos, and such. Or they could have been Democratic Party activists celebrating this wonderful influx of Louisiana evacuees, plotting and planning how to take down the dreaded Tom "cue the Star Wars empire music" DeLay and other Texas Republicans.

Who really knows what was going on in there. But it couldn't have been meaningful. After all, it is just impossible to take a man seriously with IDIOT tattooed across his forehead. Those bumper stickers are the equivalent. They just scream, "I am a spoiled brat, why can't daddy make big bad Bush go away!?!" They evoke pity. I pity such self-loathing individuals. They must be miserable human beings.

All five of those SUV-driving Texans need to seek the help of the nearest mental health professional. And in a hurry. Or just take those silly stickers off their car.


Later in the ride, and totally unrelated, I saw two ridiculously skinny (what I presume to be) meth freaks, a man and a woman, making out under a bridge where millions of sleeping bats (they still squeak during the day... and smell) live. I nearly vomited.

I think I may need to start bringing a digital camera with me to capture some of these moments.

Posted by Will Franklin · 14 September 2005 07:53 PM


Bbbbbbbbb Bigot! Sorry, But I just can't help but think about the bigot story! You have a very entertaining neighborhood... Do you need any Kerry is scary bumper stickers???

Posted by: Zsa Zsa at September 14, 2005 08:14 PM

They need a new bumper sticker saying I vote for losers...

Posted by: Zsa Zsa at September 14, 2005 09:17 PM

That reminds me of this one time when I went in the house to grab something to drink and some dudes grabbed my beautiful midnight blue Schwinn classic beach-cruiser.

The punk/s left a beat up old GT Dyno with a missing peddle. I don't even remember what I did with it.

Posted by: Sirc_Valence at September 14, 2005 10:58 PM

The fact that they're liberals who drive SUVs is a duality that's making my head spin.

Live your convictions...or not.

Posted by: Cardinals Nation at September 15, 2005 04:20 AM

Seriously? Someone leaves a bumper sticker on their car (maybe they couldn't get it off) and they're (I'm paraphrasing here) idiotic left-wing crazies who's opinions should obviously be disregarded because they are mindlessly addicted to Bush bashing?

All that from seeing their car?


Posted by: Steve at September 15, 2005 10:05 AM

Yes. What are the odds of 5 people leaving the same bumper sticker with the same embarrassingly wrong prediction on their rather nice (and spotlessly clean, except for one) vehicles like that?

There are plenty of other stickers out there. And they clearly are aware of this, as 4 of them have others on their vehicles that are not so pitiful.

Posted by: Will Franklin at September 15, 2005 10:44 AM

Will, photoblog your rides for us. Just what I want to see in the morning - meth freaks making out in a guano patch!

BTW, the guy two comments above is copying my long-used tag-line "-Steve".

Whether on purpose or not, I don't know, but I wish he'd find his own nom de plume.

Posted by: Steve at September 15, 2005 10:52 AM

Yeah, I do need to photoblog some of this stuff...

there are cool views of downtown, I saw an alligator sticking its head out of the bayou, and there are always other colorful people out and about.

Posted by: Will Franklin at September 15, 2005 02:04 PM