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Willisms

« Happy Easter. | WILLisms.com | Sunday Night Heidi Weimaraner Puppy Update: 14½ Weeks Old. »

Health Nazis Strike Again

The Health Nazis are hard at it again. It seems that they are now worried about teenage girls and eating disorders. They want cheerleaders to start covering their midriffs...and I thought there was an obesity epidemic going around...***

Australian cheerleaders have been banned from baring midriffs by officials of the sport who fear displays of skin may encourage eating disorders.

Gymnastics Australia has ordered cheerleading troupes to find new uniforms by the end of the year.

Nerine Cooper, national cheerleading manager for Gymnastics Australia, said the decision, which followed similar moves in the United States and elsewhere, was needed because cheerleaders often performed in front of family groups.

"We don't want girls to feel under pressure to lose weight because of uniforms," she told Sydney's Sunday Telegraph.

Yeah right. Because we all know that teenage girls get ALL their standards of beauty from what the latest cheerleading outfit looks like. All the waifs on EVERY TV show and in EVERY magazine have nothing in the world to do with what they perceive as beautiful.

I wonder how long until we see our first lawsuit against Seventeen or Cosmo for causing some poor kids eating disorder? Hey, don't laugh. 10 years ago people laughed at the idea of suing McDonalds.

In a related story: An All Points Bulletin has been issued for WunderKraut for aiding the spread of the obesity epidemic. If you see this man:

Yes that is me

Please tell him to put his shirt back on because the sight of his whale like body may cause other men to go out and value-size their next McDonalds order, thereby directly leading to their deaths from obesity. Plus he is scaring the kids.

*** Yes I know eating disorders are a serious thing that many girls/women/boys/men go through, but come on...

WunderKraut is morbidly obese at WunderKraut.com

Posted by Wunderkraut · 16 April 2006 05:54 PM

Comments

Next we'll be suing people for being so beautiful they make some people upset. Right now I'm going out to retain a lawyer to defend me from what I'm sure will be thousands of suits against me. Jennifer Aniston's gonna be in SERIOUS trouble.

Posted by: JohnJ at April 16, 2006 06:57 PM

Wunderkraut, Is that you? Why would they call it "morbid obesity"? The word Morbid doesn't jive with what I am seeing in that picture. Don't you have to be reeeeeeally huge?...

Posted by: Zsa Zsa at April 16, 2006 07:09 PM

Nope.

245 lbs and I am 5'-10".

My BMI shows me as obese. But I believe my health screening at work added the morbid part.

Posted by: WunderKraut at April 16, 2006 07:51 PM

Also, in the first two pictures of this post, I weighed 185 lbs and was fit as a fiddle, but even then my BMI had me as overweight.

Makes me wonder if there is a real "epidemic" or if they just changed the rules.

Posted by: WunderKraut at April 16, 2006 07:54 PM

You play the guitar? How cool is that... The next thing you will be telling us is you can sing.

Posted by: Zsa Zsa at April 16, 2006 08:33 PM

Do you suppose the mullet made you thin?

Posted by: Zsa Zsa at April 16, 2006 08:35 PM

I don't think that a single photo of you will cause a man to go out and get a nice, juicy sandwich. I, for example, have no such desire. I mean, sure, my BMI shows me to be 'Borderline' (providing you supply a LARGE border...) and I've seen the photo of you here on Willisms. There. I just looked at the photos of you on YOUR site, and the idea of a Hoagie roll, mayo, mustard...

lettuce,

tomatoes...

...

...

DAMN YOU WonderKraut!!

Posted by: Mr. Michael at April 16, 2006 10:15 PM

President Bush and most professional athletes are all considered overweight according to the BMI, as far as a I know. Needs serious revision, that index does.

Posted by: Will Franklin at April 16, 2006 10:56 PM

heh :-)

My work here is done...

Posted by: WunderKraut at April 17, 2006 06:33 AM

At 6'3" and 265, when I was swimming 2 miles a day and playing water polo daily and had 4% body fat. Of course the BMI said I was going to keel over any minute.

Posted by: Rob B. at April 17, 2006 10:11 AM

All your sentence struture are belong to us.

Posted by: Rob B. at April 17, 2006 10:12 AM

Can't help but notice that the morbidly obese WonderKraut is smiling while the earlier version is not. I think I'll have that cheesecake now.

Posted by: Laxpat at April 17, 2006 05:05 PM

Thanks Laxpat. Actually, I was not smiling because I was going through my angry teenage years. But then again...I am much happier now...plus I weigh 60 pounds more...maybe added fat does = happieness.

Posted by: WunderKraut at April 17, 2006 07:31 PM

That could explain why I've been in such a good mood all day.

Posted by: JohnJ at April 17, 2006 07:39 PM

Kirk Vonnegut wrote a short story in the 70s about this: In Welcome to the Monkey house: Harrison Burgeron. All people were made to carry around weights, sort of like handicapped horses described in Seabiscuit. Other people had to have handicapping implants in their brains to prevent anyone from being smarter than anyone else. What garbage !!! Back to Reubens?

Posted by: Chief RZ at April 18, 2006 01:17 PM

Khalid Caleb Barry Heath Bobby Nathanial

Posted by: Joey at April 27, 2006 05:10 PM